January 9, 2012

Four Seasons of Marriage by Dr. Gary Chapman–a super good book!

Posted in Uncategorized at 5:58 am by jc

 

Here’s a summary about the Four Seasons of Marriage by Dr. Gary Chapman–a super good book that I’ve been using to help my relationship with my family and friends grow stronger ^^

About Dr. Chapman
  • married for over 40 years
  • marriage counselor for over 30 years
  • more than 3.5 million of his book, The 5 Love Languages sold worldwide
Summary about the book
  • There are 4 seasons in marriage
    • Winter: distant, discouraged, dissatisfied
    • Springtime: hope, openness, anticipation
    • Summer: satisfied, comfortable, enjoying life
    • Fall: negligence, uncertainty, unsettled, apprehensive
  • 7 strategies to bring your marriage back into the spring/summer
  1. Deal with past failures: failure doesn’t destroy marriage, only unconfessed and unforgiven failure will
  2. Attitude is the difference maker
    1. negative/critical attitudes lead to fall/winter
    2. positive/affirming attitudes lead to spring/summer
  3. Discover and speak their primary love language to fill their love tank
    1. 5 love languages:
      1. words of affirmation
      2. quality time
      3. physical touch
      4. acts of service
      5. physical touch
  4. Develop the art of empathetic listening
    1. Understand their thoughts, feelings, desires and affirm them
  5. Discover the joy of helping your spouse succeed in what God uniquely designed them to do
  6. Maximize your differences: write what you complain about and look at it positively
  7. Implement the power of positive influence
    1. You can’t control your spouse’s behavior, but you can control your own, which will influence your spouse

 

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